The Sea

Student: "Did you know that sea water has crocodile meat in it?"

Blowing

Student: "TEACHER!! Susie is blowing me!"
Me: "...."

(He meant she was blowing in his face).

One

Me: "What ONE thing did you draw to show the quantity one?"
Student: "A marshmallow with a bow on its head."

Four

Me: "What four things did you draw to show the quantity four?
Student: "A dog, a cat, a sheep, and a lemur doing ballet with its tail out like THIS!" (Does tail-sticking-out motion).

Bothering

Student: "Maestra Robin!  Every time I ask Johnny to stop bothering me, he just looks at me and says, 'BROTHER JONES!"
Me: ??????

Science

Student 1: "Maestra Robin, do you know science?"
Me: "Um, I think so."
Student 1: "Well, I'm growing crystals in my house."
Me: "Cool!  Will you bring them in to show us when they are done?"
Student 2: (interrupting) "I'M GOING TO BE A PAY-REE-EN-TOLOGIST WHEN I GROW UP!!!" (paleontologist)
Student 3: (more interrupting): "I'M A NINJA!"